Sunday, March 13, 2011

Sleepy Sunday

Yesterday we took a different path down at the South Yuba.  It's called the Point Defiance Loop, goes up the hill in switchbacks and then sweeps down above and along Lake Englebright until it finally winds back to the covered bridge.  It's almost 3 miles and we did really great. Next time I'm bringing lunch to have down by the lake before tackling the last mile of scrambling around a very rocky path.  Here's a pretty view:
We earned our nap yesterday.  Last night I was too lazy to head out to find some fun so I curled up on the couch and worked on some earrings.  These are one of my favorite designs.  I wear a pair several times a week.  Now into the tumbler for some shine and then finish them up.

Oh, life is strange lately.  This time last year I was down to a couple of weeks before I had to go back to Minnesota and boy was I dreading it.  I knew down deep in my heart that I didn't belong there anymore but was trying to keep an open mind and heart.  And so I walked and thought and cried and mourned leaving this place that I love.  I noticed every budding rose and blooming daffodil and wished with all my heart that I could stay to see them burst into color.

But I did go back and I did make the decision to leave and return home, finally.  And now I am rewarded with not only the blooming daffodils but the flowering of friendships and relationships that to me are every bit as incredibly beautiful.  Sometimes it's hard.  I've stumbled many times and expect I will stumble many more in my search.  I don't know how to love halfway, it's all or nothing.  My brain kicks in occasionally to remind me of past mistakes and so there is a bit of tempering, but not much.  If my wild heart ever finds it's match then the rest is just details.

I'm starting to see that this season will be a celebration for me.  Instead of mourning I'm going to wake each day and be thankful that my year of hard work brought me to this point in time.  I feel like this spring will be so incredibly beautiful, soft and warm and fragrant.  The summer will be sun drenched, hot and burning with light, saturated with smells and tastes and the feel of cold river water on my skin.  This will be the season of sensuality for me, intense focus that brings all things into clarity.

Welcome to my world...


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