Sunday, January 01, 2012

First Day of 2012

And a fine day it was, unseasonably warm, incredibly sunny, fragrant with lingering wood smoke and the mountain defining smell of pine.  We slept in and went to the park later to play frisbee.  The boys looked pretty hot after clearing the ball field of geese and chasing the frisbees so I let them cool off in the duck pond and then we headed over to the dog park for some social time - also known as sniff butt time.

With the help of a great and talented guy I've gotten a lot of the more complicated projects done around the house.  The garage is almost ready for two cars and looks pretty damn neat and tidy. Locks work, curtain rods are ready for curtains, shelves are up and so is the really large mirror that takes up most of one dining room wall.  The potted Turkish Fir has been moved back outside.  We also have a really great door knocker.  It's a cast piece by Michael Healy.  I love people who do fine metalwork, this is truly a nice piece.

What an incredible year!

This time last year I was hanging on.  I was just starting to make friends.  The weather was awful, cold and wet and gloomy, it didn't seem like California.  I wasn't really sure what I wanted.  I had an idea forming, a wish for how things might be, and yet, no, I didn't really know what I wanted.

Do I now? Maybe, maybe not.  It's true that the more you know the more you realize how little you know.

So what do I know now?

I know that having my very own space is gratifying and satisfying way down deep in my heart.

I know that each person has the capacity to love but that each person loves in their own way.  Learning how our styles of love fit together is half the fun, sometimes frustrating, sometimes fabulous, always a learning process.

I know that rushing anything is a mistake, good things really do take time.

I know that keeping an essential vision of what we need and want is crucial to actually finding it.

I know that good friends are few and far between but that those few fill our hearts to overflowing and they are enough.

I know that we often do good things for people not because they are good but because we are.

I also know that a tiger doesn't change it's stripes and has big teeth and is often hungry.

I know that watching my children become adults is pretty freaking fabulous.

I know that pounding on a piece of metal makes me happy and a little sore when I miss.

I know that each day is a gift.

I know that I am enough, no matter what.

My heart, my words, my thoughts go with you.


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